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A Divorce Mediator in Orlando Weigh In OnHow to give kids co-parents who do it right

Divorce

Divorce brings up so many emotions for everyone involved. Being a divorce mediator in Orlando gives me an opportunity to provide divorce help to a couple and minimize trauma. A divorce mediator sees first-hand the hurt and pain that a couple is going through in the earliest stages of their final separation. They also find out about the little people that are being impacted, but do not get to show up to the table. The children are the ones who are often affected the most, but do not have a say in how the divorce is handled. Any couple hiring a divorce mediator in Orlando is making a family first decision to avoid lengthy litigation and does not want to invite the court into their family affairs.

The most important thing that I have learned being a divorce mediator in Orlando is that having a great parenting plan is key! Maybe not every divorce mediator would agree, but I believe that any divorcing couple who is committed to creating a great parenting plan, is also committed to making it work. Sometimes a divorce mediator might gloss over the value that plan has, but if your divorce mediator does this, you should be worried. If you have children, the parenting plan is the glue that will remain in-tact long after your marriage has ended. You decided hiring a divorce mediator was the right thing to do because you wanted to minimize emotional trauma to your family and that should be your goal after you meet with a divorce mediator too.

After you hire a divorce mediator in Orlando and develop a solid parenting plan, you need to begin to view your co-parenting relationship as a business transaction.

Divorce Mediator Advice

1. Keep the past out of the present.

As a divorce mediator, I work hard in mediation to ensure that clients stay forward-focused. I know it can be tempting to want to rehash the past in front of a new captive audience, but just don’t do it. This is the very first place that you need to start testing your new boundaries. When you hire a mediator in Orlando, you made a choice to stop fighting and move forward. This rule should apply to any present and future interactions you have with your co-parent from this day forward.

2. Keep your emotions in check.

Anyone dealing with a divorce is hurting. The pain will last for a while and that is normal. Emotions are normal, and you are entitled to feel how you feel. As a divorce mediator, I see clients in deep pain who find it very hard to even speak sometimes. They do not want to be hiring a divorce mediator or asking for help with the divorce process. You need to learn ways to control your emotions around your ex-spouse to co-parent effectively. This is the only way that you will find peace and be able to give your children stability. Divorce mediators in Orlando often are that last place a couple gets to process the end of their marriage together and that is where it should stay after they are done.

3. Remember your manners.

Dealing with an ex that you may not like is hard. Dealing with anyone you don’t like is hard, but it is a fact of life and you will have to do it. Saying “Please” and “Thank you,” returning communication within reasonable time frames, and maintaining professional, courteous manners will be challenging at times, but also get the job done better. Your kids will see this effort and learn that adults can be mature despite their differences. Before you hire a divorce mediator in Orlando, you should know that you can find ways to co-parent effectively. A divorce mediator will get you through the process, help you get a parenting plan in place, and keep you focused on the future.

4. Put your kids first.

Your children don’t have to deal with adult issues or stress over your mistakes. Before you hire a divorce mediator and start planning divorce, remind yourself daily that your children come first. They will be watching your every move, reaction, and your interaction with one another. Make a commitment to them that their lives will not drastically change. This commitment will be the first step you take in developing your parenting plan together.

5. Be a great role model no matter what.

Every divorce mediator in Orlando has seen their share of clients who do say or do things they wouldn’t do under normal circumstances. You should hire a divorce mediator because you don’t want to be that person for the rest of your life and want things to end amicably. Your children deserve to see you as a role model with integrity, self-control, good manners, and the ability to let the past go and move on. The divorce process is hard and as a divorce mediator, my only goal is to make it easier.

For consultation about divorce mediation in Orlando, call me today or send an email to discuss your case and options.

Heather Oller

Heather Oller is a licensed mental health professional with a Masters degree in counseling and psychology. She is an expert therapist at Orlando Thrive Therapy, Counseling & Conflict Resolution and is a Florida certified family court mediator. She is also a qualified Parent Coordinator. She specializes in conflict resolution and alternative dispute resolution.

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